Can Someone Tell Joan Rivers To Shut Her Trap

Ok, I understand Joan Rivers is a “comedian,” but I was always told not to put someone down to make yourself look better….

Well, I guess Rivers is queen of judgment.  But does that make it okay?   

Apparently we need to be more like the British TV show host ADAM hills. 

We need to stop supporting people like Joan Rivers and other pseudo celebs who only talk trash.  It’s time to realize that body type should not determine success.  Beauty should not determine success.  What some woman with countless numbers of plastic surgery because she cannot accept herself SHOULD NOT DETERMINE SUCCESS.   How do people like this earn money through bullying?

On a lighter note:

Here is Adele’s take on her body image. 

“I’ve never seen magazine covers or seen music videos and been like I need to look like that.”

“No matter what you look like, I think the key is to be happy with yourself and then if you want to try to improve things you don’t like about yourself then do them after you kind of appreciate yourself.  You know, exploit yourself sexually is not a good look, I don’t think.  I don’t find it encouraging.”

“They don’t even look like that in magazines.  I’ve seen them up close; they don’t even look like that.”

How do we get this mindset in all our girls? How do we stop our little children from becoming slaves to a fad or media’s perspective on what we should look like?  I don’t have a clue, but I know it starts by changing yourself and passing on your positivity. 

So try this:  be positive.  Love others.  Do not put others down to make yourself feel more empowered.  

Supply and Demand

Facts from the video:

• 81% of 10 year olds are afraid of being fat
• Of American girls who read magazines
• 69% say the images influence their concepts of the ideal body shape
• 49% say the pictures make them want to lose weight
• 1/3 of non-overweight girls report dieting
• 70% of people believe the advertisers and media should use more average sizes

If 70% of people believe advertisers and media should use average sizes, why aren’t we seeing a much bigger change in society?  Now that we mostly agree, we need to STOP BUYING INTO THE FAD! Supply and demand!  

Google search beauty.  This is what you will see:

We need to take over what is being supplied! Don't support magazines, television, websites that promote fake, unrealistic beauty. 

 

Pretty Little Pressure

I have been watching Pretty Little Liars for years, and I don’t think I ever thought the cast wasn’t perfect.  Of course I really only cared for the story and could have cared less about what they looked like in each episode (but seriously, if y’all would like to film an episode where you walk around in sweats all day I would be perfectly fine with that).  But apparently, even on a hit TV show where the entire cast looks like they’ve been pulled off a runway, societal pressures about appearance can be too much.  

What does this picture tell you about Lucy Hale, who plays Aria on PLL?

Does it tell you her weight? Does it show you that she would go days without eating?  Does it show her struggle with eating disorder and body-image issues?  Thankfully the article inside the magazine sheds light onto her struggle, but look at just her image.  Just the picture.  Most people would see perfection.  Perfect skin and hair. Beautiful facial structures.  Flat stomach. The look people die for.  But there was a time she did not even feel comfortable in her own body. 

Well what about Troian Bellisario, who plays Spencer on PLL. 

In an interview with Seventeen Magazine, she stated:

"Sometimes I feel like I’m trying too hard, like I don’t belong. I just look around at Lucy, Shay, and Ashley, and I’m just like, Why am I on this show? Sometimes I’ve felt like a fraud. Like, I’m not like these other girls– I don’t dress like that and don’t know how to do my hair. The minute I’m off that stage, I try to get as ‘me’ as possible. I do that by piling on my black eyeliner, and I put on my ripped tights. Dressing like myself again helps.”

“I started self-harming when I was a junior. I would withhold food or withhold going out with my friends, based on how well I did that day in school… I didn’t know what was right and what was wrong, so I think I created this bizarre system of checks and balances to create order in my world. But it really backfired.”

I think the best part of the ABC interview was when the reporter asked, 

"Are you comfortable in your own skin now?"  

Troian replied, 

"HA, no way."

This isn't something that truly goes away.  It a struggle that will continually cause pain.

By the way: Shay Mitchell (Emily Fields) has also confessed to struggling with anorexia.  

So what does this tell us? Even those we see on television and in magazines don’t feel that they fit the bill of perfection that we worship and adore in western culture. It’s sad but true. 

Sharing Differences!

I saw this on a few different websites and thought I would share! 

Accept and learn about people's differences! 

Stop the Bullying!

I saw this about a month ago on http://www.upworthy.com/, and the support and positive responses for this beautiful reporter warmed my heart. 

"You know nothing about me but what you see on the outside, and I am much more than a number on  a scale."

"That man's words mean nothing to me."

She brings up a wonderful point at the end.  She explains how children pick up on what parents do at home.  They treat others the same way their parents treat others.  So don't underestimate the power you have on the next generation.  Instead of continuing the cycle of hate, empower your children.  Teach them love, and they will love.  Teach them respect, and they will reciprocate.    

A poem by Lily Myers, "Shrinking Women," tells another woman's story of how her family has a passed down predisposition of feeling like they take up too much space."

Remember what you do is passed down.  What you do can be seen and heard around the world.  Take a stand and change the way you act! Love and accept yourself as well as others!

Real Beauty

I absolutely adore The Dove Campaign for Real Beauty

 http://www.dove.us/social-mission/campaign-for-real-beauty.aspx

So I wonder what I would put beside a picture of myself?

Skin and Bones?

Unhealthy?

Skinny?

Beautiful?

Flawed?

Freckles?

Flat?

Twig? 

I know that I'm a little bit of all these.  Everyday I strive to be healthy and to accept my own body, and I am growing and loving myself more everyday.

So now I say thank you, Dove! Thank you for showing women in their own skin.  Women who are beautiful despite what popular media says.  Women who radiate beauty just the way they are. 

 Please don't stop!

Side Note: It's funny how children say things so innocently.  When I was in elementary school my aunt  kept calling me a twig.  One day I had enough of her name calling.  She told me, "you're nothing but a twig."  I responded quickly, "Well, you're nothing but a log!"  We had a few good laughs about that one.  As a child, it did not matter how large she was, because I knew she could pick me up, play with me, even hold me while she slid down a hill of gravel so we wouldn't get hit by a train.

The Standard of Beauty

Have you seen this video?

I showed this to a few of my guy friends a few weeks ago, and they were confused.  I guess they did not realize that there is not a single woman in the world who looks like the women they gawk at in magazines, posters, etc.  It is actually quite sad how airbrushing has taken over, giving women low self-esteem while telling our men that women aren't perfect unless they look "unreal."  Why can't we take back our media?  We can start a movement! Be proud of yourself; love who you are; show yourself off!  Show the world that
skinny and perfect IS NOT beautiful! 

"Maybe she's born with it. Maybe it's Maybelline."??

Historical Beauty Trends: Footbinding

I do not understand how the Western culture continues to support unhealthy, skinny beauty trends; however, looking back on beauty trends throughout history gives me hope that one day this deathly fashion will become a worldwide taboo.  

Chinese Foot binding: 

Between the 8th century and 1900s, footbinding or lotus feet were custom for women in China.  Because bones are less dense and still growing during childhood, girls any where from 2 to 7 would begin this "tradition." During the process all the toes except for the great toe are folded down, while the arch is bent backwards.  The children's developing feet would be forced into this new appearance by tight bandages, cutting off circulation and often leading to gangrene or other infection.  The "perfect" foot would be about 3 inches long.  

My Story

My name is Mary.  I am a disordered eater.  This is me.
My Junior year of high school was when it all began.  I have always been small, and by small I mean extremely small (I was 80 pounds small).  I had never really cared about my weight or size, and I certainly never thought I would end up with disordered eating.
Today I have control; though, I will never be able to look into the future and know I’m completely healed.  It has been 6 years since the first time I stepped on a scale and did not like the number I saw, and I have been affected by a number every day since.